Protecting children after a marriage ends

Many California parents ending a marriage have a desire to make the process as easy as possible for their children. In order to achieve this goal, there are some steps commonly recommended that divorcing parents may want to keep in mind.

It’s not uncommon for children of divorce to having feelings of guilt. For this reason, parents are encouraged to protect their kids from negative talk, such as discussing how the other parent was unfaithful. Parents shouldn’t lie to their child if asked about the divorce. However, it’s advised that caution be taken when it comes to sharing some of the more painful divorce-related details. Children also tend to appreciate being told directly that the end of the marriage was not their fault. At the same time, it’s advisable to allow children to have the freedom to show affection and love equally for both parents and even for new stepparents.

Unnecessary confusion may be avoided by keeping kids informed about schedule changes. Allowing for some flexibility with schedules for children to participate in activities and have social interactions with friends can also help maintain a feeling of normalcy. Additionally, parents are reminded to encourage their kids to show love for both parents and not to take it personally if a child has times when they prefer to spend time with one parent over the other one. Finally, parents are often reminded to let kids be kids by not burdening them with adult responsibilities or communication.

Should conflicts with schedules or child custody agreements arise, a family law attorney may make an initial attempt to work out differences without getting the courts or state agencies involved. Doing so might also prevent disruptions to a child’s life as the dispute is worked out. A lawyer may also take steps to make appropriate adjustments with custody arrangements or visitation schedules if circumstances change significantly.

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